Friday, January 16, 2009

Ralph

To the majority of people in my hometown, he was the mayor. To me, he was simply Ralph, my stepfather. On Wednesday, January 14th, Ralph passed away at the age of 87 due to complications resulting from pancreatitis. Ralph was also in the early stages of Alzheimer's. My last visit over the holiday was especially difficult, as Ralph seemed a ghost of the man he was six months before. I drove him to the hospital, where the combination of pain medication and pancreatitis quickly robbed him of the rest of his mind, leaving a vacant look in his eyes. However, there were brief moments of clarity during his last days. My mother held Ralph's hand, told him she loved him, and he smiled. Ten minutes later, Ralph died. My aunt put it best: "Ralph let everyone off the hook." It was true, no matter your faults or mistakes, Ralph had pockets full of forgiveness. He was deeply religious without being preachy. It was a personal choice - he felt no need to convert others. I am agnostic, but if there is a Heaven, I'd like to think that Ralph has just been given the best seat in the house. I'm headed home in a few hours with the video below to be shown at the service, set to the tune of Ralph's favorite song. I'll miss him.