Feast Of Love

Writer: Allison Burnett (based on a book by Charles Baxter)
Director: Robert Benton
Rating: R
Run Time: 102 minutes
Trailer: Click here to view
Release Date: September 28, 2007
The Reel Man: 1 reel
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***THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS***
Master of the voiceover, Morgan Freeman opens Feast of Love with a monologue (likely lifted from the Charles Baxter novel it is based on) about how the Greek gods, to cure their near clinical boredom, invented humans. And when that didn't work, Freeman continues, “they invented love. And then they weren’t bored any longer.” But rest assured you won't find this film in any of the gods' Netflix queues - except maybe Zeus's, because despite popular belief, the ruler of Mount Olympus is a pretty easy deity to please.

An ensemble piece set in hip-city-of-the-month, Portland, Oregon, Freeman plays Harry Scott, a college professor on indefinite leave after the sudden death of his son from a heroin overdose. One of the finest actors to ever carry a SAG card, Freeman conveys volumes in a single look or raised brow. Unfortunately, his talents are wasted here and one can't help but wonder what better projects Feast of Love forced him to turn down.
Harry's friend is Bradley Thomas, played humorously by Greg Kinnear. Bradley owns Jitters, a coffee shop where a lot of the characters first meet. It is his story we are most invested in, and it delivers the majority of the comic relief. For instance, after a softball game, Harry, Bradley and his wife, Kathryn (Selma Blair), are at a bar when a woman from the opposing team joins them at their table. Within seconds, a more-than-friendly connection forms between the two women. Later, Harry remarks to his own wife, "Funny thing is, nobody noticed. Not even the husband.” His wife responds, "I’m sorry I missed that.” Harry adds, “I imagine he will be too."
But soon the film plays it safe as the lesbian story drops out entirely, as if to imply that homosexual couples do not encounter the same relationship hurdles as heterosexual couples. Of course, Kathryn is most likely not a lesbian, which will mean copious amounts of entertaining drama, entertainment that the film seems bent on avoiding. The feast, it turns out, is more of a snack.
Meanwhile, Bradley meets the cure for his broken heart, the sexy, oft naked realtor, Diana, played by Radha Mitchell. But Diana comes with enough baggage to tire even the Samsonite gorilla. To her, being faithful isn't anything more than a word.
There is also the young lovers' story. As good as Alexa Davalos looks in her Daisy Dukes, she looks even better out of them. In Feast of Love, she plays Chloe, new girlfriend to Oscar (Toby Hemingway), the "ex-jock, druggie” who still manages to make his bed and put his teddy bear on the pillow each morning. Their budding relationship is threatened by Oscar's abusive, knife-wielding, alcoholic father, Red Herring-- I mean, Bat.

Then there is the ham-fisted attempt to connect the battle of the sexes (or sometimes same-sex) with sports. Oscar and Chloe make love in an empty football stadium. And Harry witnesses another couple bump uglies on the 50-yard line (though perhaps the end zone would have been more appropriate.) And there is the aforementioned softball game, as well as a very significant plot point involving a friendly game of touch football that proves psychics really can see the future. I wish I had consulted one. Then maybe this mortal movie reviewer would not have been so disappointed.